Slump Buster- Open Dialogue

Keeping in the tradition of weird baseball superstitions, I am going to try something a little different tonight in an attempt to end the four game losing streak.  As the game goes on, I will be constantly updating this post with my idiotic musings and observations, as well as discussing the game with you guys in the comments section.  Let's end this cold streak as a team. 

Begin semi but not really live Rangers vs Jays

Top 1-  April Choo returns, so does April Rua, and then.......HOLY CRAP PRINCE FIELDER IS A GROWN MAN!! For the record, Ian Kinsler is hitting .257 with only 2 bombs and 6 SB, so keep that in your mind naysayers of JD. 

B1- Two on, nobody out, Bautista at the plate, this is exactly where we want to be.....oh......wait

Still B1- Oh man, this is UGLY.  All contact has been hard.  You guys remember when Encarnacion was not good at baseball?  Something happened there. 

B1 Finally ending- Solid plays by Beltre and Andrus to get the first two outs.  Martinez needs to get it together with the heavy workload the bullpen has had this week, or else this entire series will be ugly instead of just this half inning. 

T2- GREAT at bat by Elvis.  Fantastic.  More of that, please.  Odor is back in a big way......but here comes Martin. Bunt time?

Nope.  Leonys did roll over on one (which has kind of become his thing) at the correct time, so I'll take it.  Scratching there is big, Buehrle loves to work fast and builds in confidence, so avoiding a shut down inning was important. 

B2- Bad decision by Roogie there, but that's just part of being so young.  Learning moment.  Great replay by Bannister, I did not think they were even close to getting Reyes there.  Well done.  Facing the meat of the Jays order with one out and a runner on second rather than no outs, runners on first and second lowers the Jays total run table by .34. 

Immediately throwing the ball into centerfield destroys the run table math I just posted. That may be the end of me and math for the evening.  

We  all hear about the "bloop and a blast", but what do we call a stupid throwing error and a bloop? Any name for that yet?  Boner and a bloop?  Crap, 6-2.  I may regret not being at a bar to watch this one. 

T3- 8 pitch half inning.  Literally missed the entire thing during the time it took me to pee.  Way to make him work, guys. 

Around baseball- Scherzer is now perfect through 3 innings because he is not human and he stole Verlander's magic two years ago. 

B3- I have enjoyed watching Chris Colabello this season, I enjoy late career success stories, very much like I am loving  Joey Butler in Tampa this season.  Tonight I enjoy watching Colabello go 0-2. 

I do NOT enjoy watching Russell Martin go yard.  At what point does Moreland pitch in this one?  What's Jeff Francouer doing tonight? 

T4- Bright side: if the Rangers are getting smoked like this, at least Angel Hernandez cannot go full ump show and factor into the game, so hey, we've got that going for us.

As I hit save, Mitch hit Hernandez with a foul fall. We're screwed. 

Ezekial Carerra is no  Billy Burns. 

#UPDATE#- 3 outs are still required to end an inning, even when the game is played in Canada.  Someone tell Mark Buehrle, the whole exchange rate thing has him confused. 

B4- This game has me legitimately considering watching women's soccer.  I am at a strange point in my life, due mostly to the Rangers pitching staff and the WAR of Elvis Endrus. 

Martinez has now allowed more baserunners this inning than Scherzer has in his last 22 innings.  Let's offer the Nationals Gallo, Mazara, all of the Nolan Ryan beef, Jim Knox, Choo, and Dutch Holland's dog Wrigley for Max to see if they bite. 

T5- guys want to talk about anything other than the Rangers hitting?  Canadian Healthcare?  DirecTV commercials featuring Hannah and her horse?  Anything?

B5- I hear sirens coming over the live game feed.  Has the Mounted Guard been called in to fight the dumpster that is the Rangers over the last week?

Cookie talk has been replaced by dive bar food talk.  Everyone is giving up.  

So, I know that Jeff Bannister preaches nothing but #NeverEverQuit, but do you think he would be cool If I moved on from this one?  You know, to anything else. 

9-2 Jays.  I'm going to have my first adult beverage of the evening. 

T6- The BLOOP and............

the weakly hit DP ball. I think I may start inventing new cuss words to accurately describe this action. 

B6- Good news Rangers fans: Nick Martinez taking one for the team has saved the bullpen for the rest of the series to some extent, but it sure is tough to have a young pitcher take a beating like this and be able to come back mentally prepared for the next game. 

Good news for Jays fans: When Reyes is healthy, you guys have the best 1-5 lineup in the league.  Scary good. 

T7- I am amazed that Kevin Pillar did not make a world stopping catch on that Elvis bloop.  That dude has the glove of Jim Edmonds, but for some reason I have trouble liking him simply because his name sounds so much like Kevin Millar and Intentional Talk has worn thin on me. 

Leonys at the plate with runners on.  Press 1 for weak ground out to the right side, Press 2 for strikeout. 

Someone pressed 2. 

That threat ended weakly. 

Random Thought: with 13 players on the DL, do you think the Rangers could take advantage of Canada's healthcare while we are up there and use the financial savings to be able to afford a Cole Hamels trade?  Seems like a logical step to me. 

#UPDATE#- Scherzer has given up 2 hits.  Time to DFA. 

B7- Speaking of DFAs, Ross Detwiler, Ladies and Gentlemen!  He has got to be the first one to go when Hamilton/DeShields/Harrison/Perez/Holland return, right?  

The cat just looked at the TV and hissed.  That cannot be a good sign for Ross. 

I think Angel Hernandez is expanded the strike zone like JV umpires do in high school when one team clearly cannot compete.  Ug. Lee. 

T8- Choo has been extremely unlucky tonight, but has looked mostly healthy.  Rua, well, I like the kid, but why on earth is he hitting in the 2-hole?  He belongs there about as much as Elvis does. 

Sometime I want to hug Prince Fielder, not just because he looks soft. 

B8- I asked for Jeff Francouer on the mound way back in the 3rd inning and instead I get ADAM FREAKIN ROSALES.  

Who gives up a bomb to the second hitter he has faces, so he fits in with the rest of the bullpen. 

Tom Grieve does not like Edwin Encarnacion posing after bombs.  My solution is to not throw two meatballs to him to crush out of the park, but you know, that's just me. 

Notes about the Rosales pitching performance: 

He gave up less runs in his inning than Detwiler did in his. 

He hit 90 with his fastball, which Matt Harrison is yet to do. 

The Blue Jays won that inning 1-0, the same score the USWNT just won by in the World Cup. 

T9- The mercy killing inning. 

Let's shut this thing down.  Please. 

Joey Gallo, pinch runner?  Leonys hit a ball forward, so I guess that's a positive note to end the game on, right?  No, I guess not after all. 

With that, I am done.  Slump is not busted.  This is some fairly uninspired baseball at the moment, which is incredibly discouraging following how fun Rangers baseball has been for the last month.  Something's got to give. 

Goodnight, all.